A gripping true story of courage and  perseverance after infidelity.

Released by Focus On The Family July 9th, 2019.

“HOW GOD USED THE OTHER WOMAN” is a brave new book based on the incredible true story of faith, love and redemption in light of overwhelming odds against all three of those things.

When Tina Konkin, renowned marriage expert and speaker finds out her husband Ron, a speaker and marriage expert in his own right, is having an affair with her close friend, God transforms this disaster into one of His promises that what was intended for evil He would turn to good.

Saving your marriage after infidelity.

This staggering new book, released July 9th by Focus on the Family, bravely, with honesty and humor, recounts every agonizing, heart wrenching, but ultimately uplifting and God inspired moment that Tina faced dealing with the worst kind of betrayal imaginable.

Ron Konkin’s mother is dying. This is happening. His slightly cold, intensely focused wife Tina does what she always does – push him away and implore him to “just power through it.” Even going so far as to tell him that they will all survive, except his mother of course. Tina’s directness and business-like manner of trying to help her husband deal with his devastating grief only serves to push Ron further away…and, unfortunately, right into the open, nurturing arms of Tina’s close friend.

That’s correct, the world renowned “marriage expert” is having an affair with his wife’s close friend. As you might imagine, once Tina finds out the facade of their marriage collapses under the weight of the neglect and infidelity as both are forced to confront their worst nightmare.

Using this devastating situation to level both Ron and Tina, God then proceeds to not only REVEAL the hardness of their hearts but gives them a blueprint to REWRITE their marriage beyond anything they could have ever hoped for. But it doesn’t end there, God puts them on a journey to RENEW their relationship and makes it better than it ever was before. Their ministry was rebuilt on a solid foundation and their story has literally saved hundreds of marriages around the globe, from celebrities to billionaires to CEO’s to the every day couple, who’s lives and marriages have been saved and forever changed.

From the moment Tina is confronted with the undeniable evidence of the affair and, in turn confronts her husband, through the depths of despair that bring about Tina’s “mirror moment” where God patiently, but forcefully shows her the part she played that led to this devastating mess.

This book offers a rare and powerful, behind the curtain look at how this high-profile couple faced down obstacle after obstacle, head on and with no safety net.  We are privy to all the ugly crying and dark cold nights alone with only God and their fears to keep each of them company.

We are afforded an intimate look at a marriage on the brink that can only survive through God’s amazing grace, a couples undying desire to never give up on the marriage or each other, even when told to by their most trusted spiritual advisors and counselors to do just that, and ultimately the undying commitment to their promise before men and God to love each other through thick and thin.

We read, we hope and ultimately, we see God’s love and mercy show up in a big way.

When their deepest fears say run, God says wait. When most would take the path of least resistance, cut their losses and move on, Tina chose instead to stay and fight for her marriage.

“How God Used The Other Woman” unpacks a gripping true story of how God worked one miracle after another to sort through the chaff of this damaged, possibly beyond repair, marriage to not only repair and strengthen it, but to grow a ministry that continues to save countless marriages, as Tina says “one broken-heart at a time,” decades later.

This is a story of failure and shame, but more importantly a story of redemption and healing and perfect example of the scripture found in genesis 50:20:

“You plotted evil against me, but God turned it into good, in order to preserve the lives of many people who are alive today because of what happened.”

With one slight change: the many MARRIAGES that are alive today because of what happened.

Committed to Living Above the Line

Tina is a mother to three, grandmother to three, Founder and Director of Relationship Lifeline, and a coach to many. As an author, relationship expert, counselor, and conference speaker, she has facilitated hundreds of seminars for youth, adults, couples, and families for over 30 years. Coming from a background of abuse and abandonment, Tina’s passion is to help heal the broken-hearted by giving them a clear path to live the life they’ve always imagined.

Our purpose is to heal relationships, one broken heart at a time.

“Here’s THE book on radical relationship restoration for a throwaway society of social convenience and cultural contrivance.  Against sometimes impossible odds and improbably circumstances of injury, hurt, betrayal, they have led couples on the path of understanding something more about themselves than any self-help manual or conventional counselors. How many people have ever even conceived of pushing through the shock of infidelity and the deepest emotional pain and despair only to discover the best days of their life in marriage?
I know Tina Konkin as a dear personal friend and I knew her husband Ron before his untimely passing from this needy world as a dear personal friend as well. They have challenged more couples than anyone I have even known, to face the fractured facts of life in faith, hope, and love with brutal courage, and even a sense of humor.  This book is not the voice of theorists, but hardcore practitioners, just as you’ve seen them intervene on reality television. But it wasn’t contrived, or scripted, it’s for real. This is not a book for the faint of heart, escapists, or blame and shame based reactionaries. Read it — for what it reveals, and prepare to rewrite the story of your life with a serious shot at living a new life beyond anything your previous illusions, delusions, or distractions have afforded you.”
Gordon Riddle Pennington
Founder, Burning Media Group

“Tina passed through order (a secure marriage) to chaos (infidelity) and back to order (restored marriage) and then (chaos) widowhood. This is a remarkable story of choosing to let the power of love conquer all.”

-Dr Caroline Leaf, Cognitive neuroscientist
As pastors we see many marriages go through challenges and hardships, but betrayal is perhaps the most deadly destructive force of all. In her book, Tina does a great job of weaving the R3 principles into the story of how God healed their marriage and taught Ron and her to walk in obedience to God’s plan for their life. The book is rich with experience and wisdom for life that will give the reader practical guidance on how they too can leave a legacy with their life.
Blessings,
Pastor David Cook
CoastalChurch.org

My friend Tina Konkin experienced a fiery trial in her marriage. Divorce could have been the end of her story, but instead, through prayer, hard work, and a powerful dose of God’s redemptive grace, she and her husband emerged from that crisis with a deeper and stronger relationship than they had known before. Now Tina has dedicated her life to ministering to couples in crisis and helping them find healing and renewal—a mission we heartily embrace at Focus on the Family. If your marriage is at a breaking point, this book can help.

Greg Smalley, Psy.D.
Vice President, Marriage and Family Formation
Focus on the Family

This courageous story of brokenness and betrayal reveals how God can bring hope and restoration in the midst of marital devastation.  Journey with Tina and her husband, Ron, through their struggle to learn and apply the healing principles of the “R3 Factor: Reveal, Rewrite, Renew,” while rebuilding their marriage with compassion and forgiveness.  Their Relationship Lifeline ministry has breathed new life into hundreds of marriages, including many in my own church family.  For anyone experiencing the pain of betrayal, I encourage you to grab hold of Tina’s story and trust Jesus to transform your relationships into something more than you could ever imagine.

Matthew Cork,
Senior Pastor, Friends Church Yorba Linda
Superintendent, Evangelical Friends Church, Southwest Region

This book is a treasure that is filled with such wisdom and insight that has been gained at a great personal cost.

We had a unique, inside view into this story and saw the impact it had as the devastation unfolded. We also were privileged to witness the hard work and effort that went into allowing God to go to work, creating such beauty from the ashes that could have buried them.

Everyone needs this book or knows someone who needs it. Tina courageously invites us into her story to learn from her journey, and has filled this book with godly wisdom and insight on how to take steps to move forward in life.

As pastors, we are committed to seeing marriages, families and relationships thrive and we consider it an honour and privilege to support and endorse this book and the work and ministry of Tina Konkin.

John and Helen Burns,
TV Hosts, Sex, Love and Relationships
International Speakers and Bestselling authors
Pastors, Relate Church, Canada

For all Media inquiries such as press interviews and speaking engagements please contact,

info@relationshiplifeline.org |  (949)510-7016